Nine trips in ten years. I’m letting that sink in. It’s not too often that I achieve a long long term goal. Well that’s the nature of long term goals, we only reach a few of them in a life and you can’t know which ones you’ll actually achieve. We had luck and determination going for us. The goal, imagined in 1994 in our Chicago apartment, was to have careers that would allow us enough time off to travel to a different country every year. I just did the math and that was 25 years ago.
We went and got degrees in education but instead of starting up our travel life again, we decided to start a family. A pause was placed on the travel fantasies so that I could raise kids while we lived on Luis’ income. The idea was that when the kids went to school then I would go back to work, and that was in the fall of 2008. Summer of 2009 we took our first trip to Costa Rica. Our friend Kathleen drove us to the airport and when she hugged us goodbye she said “make all of your dreams come true.” She really understood that that moment was a significant milestone in our lives and hearing her say that made me realize it too. We traveled every summer, except for one, after that trip making epic treks to Peru, Dominican Republic, Columbia, the Eastern Sierra Mountains in California, Panama, Nicaragua, Mexico, Portugal, and finally Ecuador. We stayed true to our roots on those trips using public transportation, eating street food, staying with local families, and always heeding the mantra “if you can’t carry it in your backpack you can’t bring it.”
At the end of this trip to Ecuador I told Maya that it was probably our last trip for a while and she agreed. I noted that I was ending phase 2 of my travel life. I talked about my “phase 1“ travel life of all the places her dad and I went to when we were in our 20s, then the big pause for college and raising kids, and then the decade of travel that I’m calling “phase 2“ with my children. She said the end of my phase 2 was the end of her phase 1 and she hadthat existential pause and she considered what her next travel chapter would be. Where she would go, who she would be with, and that it would probably be without her parents for the most part because she was beginning her own dreams. I guess you could say it was kind of a moment.
I learned a couple of things on this trip. I learned that you can’t always trust old ladies. There was the shopkeeper who kindly give us directions to our next mode of transportation who also made a point to pat my front pocket as if confirming she could see a wad of money in there. And then there was the elderly lady bathroom attendant who took my dollar.
I learned that I made accommodation reservations based on what I thought my 50 year-old self wanted, a quiet hotel like atmospheres with zero social scene. But I also realized that I really missed a relaxing communal space and that it’s quite nice to be able to go down into an open courtyard and meet with other travelers. That was one of the highlights of everything we did when we were young, conversing with people from all over the world. Not all of our bookings were stodgy, we definitely stayed in a few places with wonderful common spaces.If there’s a next time, I will definitely be booking places with shared kitchens and areas to socialize.
I will never tire of riding on the bus as it hurtles through the Andes mountains. I will never get sick of aimlessly wandering for hours in a hot, crowded, loud, and chaotic Latin American city. From observing my daughter, I could tell that she feels the same way. What makes us compatible is that we have such a high tolerance and a genuine love for both of these essential parts of traveling.
Another lesson: when your daughter hands you an earbud always, always, always take it. Teenagers don’t always talk with their parents about their innermost selves, but when they invite you to listen to their music you’re certainly getting an invitation to their heart. If there was a deep spiritual moment on this trip it was most certainly when we were on one of those gorgeous bus rides in the mountains and Maya hands me an earbud. I’ll admit I had to turn my face away as tears just streamed down my face looking out that window. It was one of those moments of severe and profound gratitude for every single thing that is happening in that singular moment. It’s not something you can wish for or plan for, it’s something that just happens when you’re open and raw and then it just hits you out of nowhere. If you’re wondering, this was the song that caused my eyes to leak.
Churches, museums, and street art never get old.
There’s no problem that an Inca Kola, a bowl of soup, and some chicken and fries won’t solve.
I learned to be proud, that even though I’m almost 50 and have recently been losing some faith in the ability of my body, I can still go up to 15,000 feet and ride a mountain bike down a volcano.
A homestay never fails to be a learning experience and a cultural exchange, even if it’s just for a few nights.
Not only do I like bus rides but I really like riding in the back of trucks to tiny villages.
If you have the chance, splurge on a $17 spa experience and take the time to go to the real equator.
Last but not least, and I didn’t really learn this I actually already knew it, but this kid, this daughter, is seriously one of the best humans in the world, across all of space and time and eternity.
